Re: hirsbrunner euphonium for sale


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Posted by Reginald Farnsworthy on May 31, 2003 at 17:57:14:

In Reply to: hirsbrunner euphonium for sale posted by William Pemberton on May 29, 2003 at 20:18:31:

Dear Sir:

I am shocked and angry at your blatant and surly capitalistic greed. I should not be knowing of your lured and tempest past. I thought your name sounded familar. I researched my Maury Povich tapes and sure enough, there you were, #3 on the 10 most wanted list of "Willson abusers". I will never forget that show, "Willson owners and the neglected horns that love them anyway" so it does not suprise me at all to find you hocking a Hirsbrunner. You sir, are a Hirsbrunner hocking Helicon hack!!! I am a Willson man and will not fall prey to your little scheme. I am an American and that word ends in "I can". You sir play a Helican and that word ends in "I con". I will not be a part of your little con or any of your charades. Perhaps we should call that warped wrap of metal you honk on a "helicarn". Especially after the sideshow antics you have used to sell an otherwise reputable and wonderful instrument. "Come see the amazing Hirsbrunner! Brought back by near death and disaster by my special elixor.....blah, blah, bhah." Please! Do you take us for fools and idiots! You should be ashamed of yourself....you CARNY!! Can you say "The Music Man"? You say you own a Willson but do you love your Willson. Trying to unload a broken and crushed Hirsbrunner. I imagine your Willson is a little crushed and broken too! WillSON!!! Notice that it ends in SON. I bet your son is broken and crushed from all the neglect. Oh the mighty helicon is mighty happy I am sure. But let me tell you something Mr. Pemberton.... I notice they left the "e" off the end of your name. It is not "Pembertone" is it? No. A little weak without the "e" isn't it? Just like everytime you play an "e" on that hideous Holton... just a little weak. You could play an "e" on your Willson but do you care? Not one bit. I can only say in closing that this shameless display of eratic behavior you have shown is deplorable and incomprehensible along with a little naughty and for that sir you should be banished from the land of Willson. I tis no wonder you sock drawer is in the condition it probably is!

Good day sir and may you have learned a little something from all of this.

With no respect,

Reginald Farnsworthy
Former president, Filibuster Society for the Whimsical Nonsense


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